Jenifer Fox- Your Child’s Strengths

Today’s show features a really terrific guest- Jenifer Fox-President of the Purnell School, an all-girl’s boarding school, and the author of Your Child’s Strengths- Discover Them, Develop Them, Use Them. We speak about a range of subjects, but the most important one of all is how critically important it is to emphasize your child’s true talents and strengths.

(Oddly enough, I had an opportunity just 36 hours later to put this advice to work. One of the boy’s midterm report came back, and the news was, at best, mixed and not what he had led us to believe it would be. Rather than getting angry, as he expected, I sat down with him and we used it as an opportunity to learn. What had been going well, and what had not? Which study methods had been panning out, and which were not working so well for him? Instead of using this as an opportunity to make the kid feel worse- (he was doing a pretty good job all on his own of being disappointed and needed no help on that score from anyone), we chose instead to decide together, with him, what we could do differently that would help him.)

If you get a chance, I urge you to read Jenifer Fox’s book, Your Child’s Strengths. Give it to teachers you know. We all need to begin to change the tide in education, and part of this change starts with identifying what’s good in each person, and finding ways of making them feel successful.

Kids face a daily birage currently of what they do wrong- the Gates Foundation reports that many high school dropouts are not dropping out because of anti-social behavior, but because they’re bored and fail to see the relevance in the education they are receiving. We need to start making a change now, to keep kids in school, to make school a meaningful experience that sets kids up to be life long learners and problem solvers.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Show #57: Dr. Robert Brooks- Raising Resilient Children

I can’t think of a better way to help celebrate the 1st Anniversary of the LD Podcast, than my conversation with Dr. Robert Brooks. I met Dr. Brooks almost two years ago now, when he gave a lecture at the Centreville School. He was kind enough to read a book proposal I gave him, and indirectly, our conversations and his encouragement gave me the confidence to start the podcast. So a personal thank you to Dr. Brooks for helping me find my own voice.

Dr. Robert Brooks has lectured nationally and internationally to audiences of parents, educators, mental health professionals, and business people on topics pertaining to motivation, resilience, self-esteem, family relationships, the qualities of effective leaders and executives, and balancing our personal and professional lives.

He has also written extensively about these topics. He is the author of a book titled The Self-Esteem Teacher and co-author with Dr. Sam Goldstein of the following books: Raising Resilient Children; Nurturing Resilience in Our Children: Answers to the Most Important Parenting Questions; Seven Steps to Help Your Child Worry Less (with Kristy Hagar); Angry Children, Worried Parents: Seven Steps to Help Families Manage Anger (with Sharon Weiss); Seven Steps to Improve Your Child’s Social Skills (with Kristy Hagar); Understanding and Managing Children’s Classroom Behavior: Creating Sustainable, Resilient Classrooms, and The Power of Resilience: Achieving Balance, Confidence, and Personal Strength in Your Life (the latter focuses on resilience in adults). In addition, Dr. Brooks is co-author of a book with Drs. Mel Levine and Jack Shonkoff titled A Pediatric Approach to Learning Disorders and has written a sex education book for the young child called So That’s How I Was Born! Drs. Brooks and Goldstein co-edited a textbook titled Handbook of Resilience in Children; they also prepared a parenting video and curriculum about resilience and have produced a documentary “Tough Times, Resilient Kids” that was a finalist in the 23rd Telly Awards.

Dr. Brooks received his doctorate in clinical psychology from Clark University and did additional training at the University of Colorado Medical School. He is on the faculty of Harvard Medical School and has served as Director of the Department of Psychology at McLean Hospital, a private psychiatric hospital. His first position at McLean Hospital was as principal of the school in the locked door unit of the child and adolescent program. He has a part-time private practice in which he sees children, adolescents, adults, and families and has appeared regularly on television shows in the Boston area as well as on national cable television.

Dr. Brooks and Dr. Goldstein also have a new book coming out at the end of the summer, entitled The Self-Disciplined Child- something I know we all want for our kids and for ourselves.

In this first part of our two part conversation, we talk about what it takes to be a succcessful adult. Many kids with LD have a hard road to travel down, but their approach and attitude towards these difficulties can make all the difference in the world. We talk about LD being not an excuse, but an inderstanding of where a child is coming from; holding kids accountable for their actions, finding those Islands of Competence, and taking a strength-based approach to your child.

In part II, we’ll talk more about changing negative scripts, strategies to get desired results, Listening to your children to understand what’s really going on, and knowing how your children would describe you versus how you want them to describe you.

Dr. Brooks has an excellent website where you can find out more about his writings, subscribe to monthly articles, read past articles, and even find out if he is speaking in your area. You can purchase his books through this link to our LD Podcast Amazon Bookstore, where you’ll find links to books we’ve discussed.

We’d like to put together a show all about you, the listeners, so please call into the voicemail line at (206) 666-2343, or send your emails to ldpodcast@gmail.com. I’d love to hear from you!

Click Here to listen/download Dr. Robert Brooks- Raising Resilient Children Part I